I thought I would start with my last birth. The birth in which has lead me right here with you and inspired a book. The birth energy hasn't stopped flowing out of me since our baby girl came Earth side.
Our baby arrived long before her birthing day. I had 2 miscarriages close together in 2018 and I always knew those two babies will find their way to me. I was blessed with two babies in 1 and half years of each other. After such a healing freebirth with my son, I felt those knocks on my womb again. Those knocks that are either asking 'can I come home' or just I'm already here and letting you know mama. We welcomed that energy straight in and in that moment I knew my baby girl was right there in my womb. I know and listen to my body and menstrual cycle really well so as soon the next moon phase came round and I didn't bleed I knew then and there I was pregnant. The days went on as usual. I nourished my body with organic foods, kept grounded in nature and spent my days with my children home schooling. I did not need any medical advice or procedures or better yet, I didn't need to give any money away to big pharmacy corporations on pregnancy home kit test or ultrasounds. I didn't rely on a medical professional telling me or confirming what I already knew. I was with child. I trusted myself. I trusted my body and baby. As always, I have beautiful pregnancies. I opted out of ultrasounds and dopplers again. I have become a pro using my stethoscope and mapping out my babies while in my womb. For a few years, I was part of a monthly women’s circle where a beautiful birthkeeper held space for us women. I was so familiar with her energy, I wanted her around my birthing space but unfortunately she moved overseas late in my pregnancy. I’m still crying, I miss her smiling face and warm hugs and delicious teas. I’m quite sensitive to who I let in my personal space, llet alone pregnancy and birthing space. I needed a familiar face. All women need familiarity especially in such a sacred event. I decided to get in touch with a lovely private midwife. We have been friends on social media for a few years beforehand and very close friends of mine absolutely adored her presence. I had no concerns for my baby or changes in my dream birth, I still trusted birth but wanted an option for post natal care. She didn't attend my birth but provided post natal care I've never invested in before. I always put so much pressure on my husband to look after me and the kids on his own. I had a really relaxed post natal experience for the first time but more on my post natal care in upcoming blogs, back to the dream birth I experienced.
Sunday night I found some Christmas twinkle lights (call us the Griswold's, we love decorating the house). I stuck the small battery operated lights around the bath tub underneath beautiful pictures of my family hanging on twine, called everyone in (insert drum roll) JOY TO THE WORLD... turned the lights on Ta da, we're officially ready for a baby. Twinkle lights are set 😆
The next day I woke up knowing something was different. It felt it in the air, I felt in my body. I said to everyone I think a baby is coming today, don't know when but today. I jumped in the bath with my daughter and we sang and chanted together a song from my Mother Blessing over and over until we got finkles (wrinkley fingers and toes). By then my 18month old baby boy was due for a feed and a nap so we went and snuggled in bed and as he started to feed from my breasts, my body began these surges of waves from my belly down to my toes. They got more intense and regular as the feeding went on.
Throughout my pregnancy, I reminded myself and everyone I was going to have an hour birth. I already had reasonable quick labours but I manifested this birth from the moment my womb was her home. I'm going to have a blue eyed, Libran baby girl, a pain free 1 hour labour surrounded by my family and my daughter as my Birthkeeper.
As soon as my baby boy fell asleep, I left the bed to tell the rest of the family how I was feeling. I went back to the bathroom to have a shower. The water felt amazing running down my body but the waves eased so I hopped out. Mitchell (my husband) came to see how I was going. He wrapped his big bear arms around me and started singing the same chant as the one myself and daughter sang earlier. From that moment I felt her drop, everything felt heavy and I couldn't stand up straight. It was on like donkey on. Mitchell started jigglying my pelvis, the shake made the intense waves wash away. Mitchell just kept whispering in between his song, relax, relax your jaw, relax your hands. He wasn't just talking to me but he was singing and talking his baby girl down too. Pure magic from him. Moments I will forever cherish and so proud to announce to the world how supportive Mitchell was and still is. By then our baby boy woke up from his nap so Mitchell left to look after the 3 boys and my daughter came into the bathroom to support me. We hopped into our spa bath and started running the tap water over my lower back while my daughter started scooping water up in a bucket to run more water over my back. All the boys strolled in, they brought in warm teas, coconut water and their cameras. My baby boy couldn't resist a bath so he jumped in to play. I was on all fours letting the water run over my body from the tap and said ''the baby's coming''. My daughter still powering away behind me with her bucket of water pouring down my back and massaging me yells out, "I can see her head." I reached down with one hand and had her little wet head cupped in my hands. Mitchell quickly jumped in the bath. When I said the baby's coming, Mitchell thought I meant I'm in labour and eventually a baby will be here , he didn't know that I meant RIGHT NOW. He mentioned later too how quiet and calm I was. I was calm and focused, I had all my babies with me and knew I was in great hands with my daughter as my Birthkeeper.
So I was in THE position now and wasn't intending to move so being on all fours, I needed assistance behind me. Mitchell told our daughter to cup her hands and get ready to pass the baby up to mama. She held her little sister's head, ready for her her body to emerge. I felt our new baby slide out, my Birthkeeper daughter passed her new baby sibling in between my legs. I grabbed her, I looked at her beautiful face and started rubbing her vernix all over her body, I even rubbed it all over my face to keep the wrinkles away, Ilve never seen so much vernix on a baby. I held her slippery body tight on my chest. She wasn't crying but I could hear. She too was calm and focused. She was slowly getting ready for a big cry and she let out a baby lioness roar, a 'I'm here family' then just went back to being snugged in my arms. Her big baby brother watching on curiously, found a quick opening and jumped on the tittie (as we like to call it) and started suckling. By doing so I felt a bit dizzy and the placenta came straight out. Our baby girl still snuggled in, I 'officially' had a look to see if our baby was a girl and when I did I just broke down crying. A girl. I knew even before she was in my womb growing, when she was a little knock, a gentle whisper. We have sisters now. I felt a huge shift in our matriarch ancestral lineage. A sense of healing from any past traumas in our family and shifting birth as it was meant to have always been, beautiful, full of love and in my own power. I manifested. I dreamed. As natural and primal as can be, birth was not a medical emergency but a celebration for our daughters and sons to witness yet again another free birth in our bathroom. My daughter apart of the sisterhood, confidently, learning more about birth and how women's bodies transform, how her own body works. This is where power, knowledge, and wisdom comes from and it can start at any age. How friggen proud I am of my daughter, my blood all over her hands and body (you can just see her little hand in the frame below), absolutely no blood shame whatsoever but with a badge of honour to say she was there for her mama and her sister. The uprise of little women taking back birth and their bodies.
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